This is it

Go all the way – into Paradise

Yes, my friends, go all the way!

Paradise is such an amazing place, and so worth it! Hanging out with Jesus……where else could I rather want to be? I truly don’t know.

The last few weeks: phewww, what a journey. But all I can say: I am finally back, where I belong.

Did you know, that where you belong is not a location, nor a destination. It’s to have arrived, smack in the middle of your own heart. The place where God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit abide, where the threesome is one with who you are. Your full potential at your fingertips! Thank you, Jesus for taking me back, to where I belong, in your arms forever! #thankful!
I love you – I always will, and this is my dwelling place.

All the struggles, all the pain, everything all of the sudden so worth it.

Everything brought me closer to your heart of hearts, where I would see clearly: you are all I ever needed, all I ever wanted, and my arms are opened wide.

It’s like a song, actually all of my favourite songs blended into one, all my birds highlighting different moments in time. My father, my mother, my son, my daughter, my siblings, my friends, all part of me, all blended into one.

I can see them now, for who they are, they all are a vital part of who I am, who I have become. Everything I rejected or judged in them, I rejected or judged in me. Now, that all these aspects are integrated inside of me, and I can cherish and appreciate all of them, or all of me, strife and jealousy no longer are needed.

I can soar! Like the Eagles soar, high up in the air. I knew it was possible. Here I am.

Thus, this is good bye – this time for good! Or better, until I see you in Heaven. Or better at my new blog ‘Harvest Time’ (In the name of the Father). On the other side of all of us, is Christ. Heaven. Paradise.

On the other side of all our separation struggles is Oneness with God, the father, God, the son and God, the Holy Ghost. The holy trinity of God is waiting for each and everyone of us.

Our inheritance and our destiny is Heaven – Heaven here on earth. Or once we have died to the physical world. It’s a choice, and the choice is ours. Free Will, the greatest gift of all.

Decide, to return into the loving arms of Christ, he is waiting there for you. He knocks at your heart’s door. Will you let him in?

I did, and my wildest dreams are coming true.

In his love forever – be strong and courageous. He will never ever disappoint you.


– finally home🌟 – no more tears -😍 (except happy or healing ones) β˜€οΈ

P.S. The Featured picture is by Julia Watkins, Energy Artist. Her work is simply amazing. Awesome work, JuliaπŸ’ž


Finances 303

Receive your blessings
Your help comes from the Lord – Always 🌟 Amen

Hello my sweet friends, 

here is what I learned just these last few days: the enemy has us trapped in this lie: that money rules the world, and time is money. Well, the good new is: it is not! God is, thus, Love is.We have been believing this for so long. It is going to take some serious unraveling of old/false belief systems.

Over the last months, I was stuck in my own rut – thinking that nothing was going to redeem the financial burden, that my parents are facing now. And of course not to mention my own. 

Interestingly I was willing to trust the Lord with the healing of my parents, against the existing doctor’s diagnosis. The reason being: a) I had experienced healing myself with my own asthma and allergies. b) when Jesus walked the earth, he and his disciples healed ailing people. And I have heard healing testimonies myself.

However, I had a rough time, believing, that all things are possible for God. He saved Daniel in the Lion’s den, he parted the Red Sea for Moses and the Israelites, he broke down the wall of Jericho. He created the Universe with all it’s galaxies – he can break the power of hell (money). 

By the way: money in and of itself is not evil. But the way we feel about it is, puts us in bondage. We think, we need it to make ends meet. The truth is: we don’t! Jesus is enough. He forever will be. Our needs are forever met in the glorious riches of Christ. When we start merely existing, to pay our bills, we are missing the life, Jesus came to bring. God actually wants us to pursue our dreams, to make a difference, by doing what we love doing, using the gifts and talents, he has given us. 

He can turn everything around in an instant. Just like he did, when Moses was faced with the Red Sea in front of him and the Egyptians coming after him, to enslave the Israelites all over again. I have been there myself for a long time now, so many months of bondage. But guess what: if we trust him, he will do it for either one of us.

All things are possible for God. All we need to do is: Be still and know, that He is God.

It takes a lot of undoing of what we believed for so long. The good news is: 

We will get there, if we never loose sight of what Jesus can do in, through and for us.

Trust him, my friends, and he will walk with us into the promised land. And we will never have to leave again. Amen – thank you Jesus. Praising him.


Packing up and going home – revisited


Expecting his best – always

Hello my dear friends

Again and again, I am being changed from Glory to Glory, by his great compassion for me. His plans are always higher than mine, his ways and thoughts are always higher and better than mine. Why am I calling this post: Packing up and going home – revisited: Last year I posted a similar post… can find that post in my blog inhispresence4evermore – written March 21, 2015. Click on the link below, to read the post:

Are we to go home, and leave Canada for good? I am trusting him for the answers, for the plan.

Somehow I believe, we ought to stay here for a few more years, but it sure doesn’t look like that in the so called reality.

There is only two ways, that it could work:  I find a company, that meets the provincial sponsorship criteria, or the government reverses my status back to permanent resident, as it was before I was falsely advised to renounce my status.

Will our lives be here – or abroad. My daughter’s fervent prayer is to stay here. This is her home. It’s here she has her friends.

My son is a little less attached to staying here. This doesn’t surprise me. He had to suffer through so much here in Canada. But again, God can redeem all that. Will he do it for us.

Is Satan arguing our case with God Almighty even now: ‘You may think, this woman and her children are yours, but what if I shook up their whole existence? Would they still praise and worship you?’ – well: yes, the answer is yes! We would! I always will. I can’t let go.

I trust him with all my heart, and lean not on my own understanding. It is no coincidence that this is my tattoo just above my left ankle. This has proven my life verse for many years now.

I go, where he has me go, and I know, whatever the devil intends for evil. God will turn it around for my/our best. He has in the past and he will in the future.

Looking back, all of life’s curveballs have brought me closer to the heart of my beloved, and the peace that floods my heart, even in the midst of financial break down, of challenges on numerous levels, is paramount.

So, looking back: I have to say, that I have to thank Satan for all that he has thrown our way. I would not be in my relationship with the Lord, where I am, if he had not tried to stop us in our tracks. Just, like Jesus had to be betrayed by Judas, to go to the cross to bring salvation to mankind, to fulfill the Father’s plan for redemption. Ultimately we have to thank Judas for his work.

Satan, as it seems right now, has proven to be a catalyst in my faith walk. Maybe we have it all wrong – maybe he is actually helping us, to return back home, and return to our personal Eden.

I trust, that the Lord will restore unto us, all that seems lost right now. He will show us the way – and in surrendering to his plan, we will lose all our self centered egotistic desires, and will find our true identity in Christ. Just like God had intended it from the start.
Let’s go, my friends, embrace the curveballs of life and end up in Heaven.

See you there πŸ’ž


Again, I am asked to let go.

Trusting, Hoping and Believing him for all he said he would do!

Hello my friends…..

Lately I have had another load of big struggles in – and outside of me. 

These days, I find it easier to resonate with my son, than with my daughter. She is turning into quite the teenager with an attitude. Mind you, she is only 10. 

My son has had some rough patches lately, too – luckily we got it sorted out and are even closer now. 

The financial situation is still extremely difficult. Especially since a source of income, that I had considered trustworthy turned sour in just a couple of days. How blessed am I, that despite the possibility of loosing money, where I thought I had finally found a way to sustain my family, no real damage was done. Thanks to my Jesus watching over me and his Angels making sure, that I was not in harms way.

Yet, that leaves me scrambling again. Not knowing where and how I can sustain my family. But I have to say: I am at peace – in the depth of my heart, I know, that my Jesus will come through again, how he has done many times over! 

But last night, when I felt extremely frustrated at my daughter, I felt compelled, to ask: Lord, why is our relationship that way – what is causing us, to see each other in such a way, that we cannot see the good, but have to find fault?

This morning, as I was leaving the house, to get coffee……the Lord showed me, that I had a lot of resentment inside my heart, with respect, to how my situation is right now, I feel taken advantage of, mainly by my original family – the choices they made, have brought me to where I am right now. Mind you, I allowed it, but I am still where I am.

I know, that my little girl feels the same way in many aspects of her life. Until I release these resentments into the hands of the only one, that can heal my heart, we are bound to frustrate one another (my daughter and I – and if I look deeper, my mother and I share the same feelings, my mother and her mother, too). Again it’s this passing unresolved issues on from generation to generation. 

Yet, with my son, 5 years ago, I took a step, to break those chains, that bound him and me in a similar struggle. Jesus guided my steps, and I faced a lot of the issues head on, holding on to my saviour’s hand. Knowing that he was going  to walk through this with me.

Today, my son and I have a much better relationship. Now I am going to do the same for my girl. Jesus will have to help me with that one, too.

Already today I got to release some pain and I shed some tears, I know, there will be more. But ultimately I know, that we will emerge from this journey, more like Christ, more beautiful, we will have handed the ashes to the one, who longs to give us the beauty, if we only hand him all the pieces.

Very often we don’t even know, that we are still holding on to old wounds – let him show you, where you are hurting, and he will heal your heart. Very tenderly, one piece at a time. Trust the journey and he will finish the good work, he has begun in you and me.

Then, one day, we will be able to see everything in a different, more splendid light, and all our tears will be wiped away. And we shall see Jesus face to face! 

God bless you, my friends, I love you,


If we did Love Christ’s way, we’d find infinite Joy and infinite Peace

Hello my friends, 

I am actually surprised, I am back already. I am still stunned, at what he is given me just a little over a week ago. Mind you, all hell seems to be breaking loose every few days…..but he is faithful, he is guarding my mind and my heart. 

His peace has been mine now for well over a year – he is now establishing his joy in my soul. At times it’s not easy to keep, especially with the news from across the pond. But interestingly enough, even though my own situation has once again gone into a tailspin, the peace and joy, when I stay in the spirit, is a reality.

My heart is at rest, I know, he is transforming my mind a little more each time, tragedy or disaster strikes. He calibrates me more and more to seeing what he sees.

When we humans think, that our life falls apart, it actually falls into place.

Again I fell for the lie of the devil, still believing, that I needed money, to fix my situation. Whereas really, I only need more of Jesus, a deeper level of trust in him.

What I believed was divine intervention, wasn’t. Makes me think of three years ago, when I started dating someone I had met during my college time. Only to find out, that I deserved a deeper commitment than I was given, from the man I dated. What I thought was divinely inspired, wasn’t. Because we did not stand for the same values.

Still single to this day, and still waiting for my breakthrough – the breakthrough, that God has promised such a long time ago. Friends of mine had theirs. Much faster it seemed, and often I wonder, if mine will ever come.

All I know, the last years have been a constant pruning of who I am, of who I am meant to be. It feels I am stuck between the now and the not yet forever. 

How much longer? I don’t know. What I do know, however, is, that today again, Jesus prevented a big disaster. His protection goes so deep. Thank you Jesus. I am forever grateful for his divine intervention. 

I will never walk away, even if I was promised the whole wide world at my feet. I am much safer in the arms of him, who died for me. He brings me Peace and Joy everlasting.

Things seen are the things unseen manifested in the physical realm. The more I live and walk in the spiritual realm, the more I see the true beauty of God’s creation. The more I can never ever feel fully at home here, where life and people seem so fickle. Tossed around like nutshells in the sea.

I’d rather take a nap close to him, always knowing, that he keeps me safe. And the storm cannot harm me.

I am just passing through. This is not my home. The kingdom of God is. Where my husband is preparing my home for me. He is busy planning our wedding day. What a celebration that will be. I love you Jesus – you are forever mine. I am forever yours.

Love Christ’s way, that’s my quest. Timeless love, twin hearts united. That’s what love is for. That is what I am waiting for. Infinite Joy. Infinite Peace. Infinite Love with the one, that God has for me. Nothing can lure me away from his promise: to be united with him, who died for me. 

I know, this sounds completely off the hook. The world preaches instant gratification, if one relationship doesn’t fill your needs, go find another.

But true fulfillment can only be found, in a love that lasts a lifetime, and beyond. When we do love Christ’s way, we find deep joy and peace in loving and respecting our mate. This is God’s design for love. We better heed it, or we miss out on the infinite Joy and Healing found therein.

Forever your friend, 


Thank you Jesus – I πŸ’— you so much!Β 

Hello my dear friends, 

Today I am writing to you – I know it has been a while. It has been quite the journey over the last while. But God has been faithful once more. Jesus has kept me afloat, and he has renewed my hope and my faith got strengthened. I can never put words to what he has done.

Let me start, by saying: I love him so much. My faith has been quadrupled through all that has been going on in my life. 

Again, he gave me a deeper understanding of what his plan for our life here on earth truly is. And how he is changing us from Glory to Glory all the time. How he is depositing more and more of Heaven into our being. 

By choosing to trust him, even in the most dire circumstances, when it seems, that the world is closing in and you are not sure, if you were just imagining all that has changed in your life because you placed your trust solely in him…. – as if the world did have the final say, and you had to cave in. He lifts you up, and all of the sudden, you are set free – AGAIN.

Thank you Jesus – wow, I am literally speechless! I will leave it at that for now. I don’t think I can really explain all that happened, at least not yet.

All I know, is that the life in the Spirit, where you can see Heaven, hear Heaven, feel Heaven, smell Heaven, touch Heaven, yes even taste Heaven, is worth all the heartache and pain. All of the sudden you understand, why things had to happen, the way they did.

And truly all is good with your soul.

I will have to sit with this for a while, and just sing praises to God, be in his presence and rejoice. It may be some time until I am writing again.

One last thing, before I close off for today: in the last few days, the Lord has given me a glimpse of how, what I believed to happen already last year (write fiction), will come about.

His presence is all I need, to move forward. Resting in his arms, is what keeps me going. Lately I have been spending some precious quality time with him. He is the love of my life and I will never let go. I can never let go. We have been through too much, for me to not hold tight to his hand, that will ultimately lead me back to Paradise for good.

Here is two songs, that really meant and mean a lot to me: ENJOY! 

Heaven Lindsey Sterling
Stand by me Rachel Platten

Looking forward to seeing you in Heaven πŸ˜ŠπŸ’—πŸ™Œ.

God bless you always, your friend,


He never stops to blow my mind

Yes, my friends, he is all that and so much more.

I still feel as if I am in the movie ‘und ewig grΓΌsst das Murmeltier’ – aka ‘Groundhog Day’!

Things happen, and situations occur over and over again. Very often it seems as if I get a chance to rectify things this time around. Where I went wrong before, either due to my own clouded vision, or due to the clouded vision of other people involved.

The clouded vision I am talking about, means, not seeing the situation, like Jesus does. He has helped me wear the eyes of grace, mercy, redemption and love rather than the ones of condemnation, judgement and hurt ego.

I am forever grateful for this new vision. All things look different now. Nothing, as bleak as it may appear, is really bleak. Forever there is hope.

Again I am approaching my birthday. Turning yet another year older – and looking back, I can say, that 2015 sure was one of my hardest yet – facing challenges galore on so many levels, but in hind sight, I can say, that it only made me love Jesus more.

His love has always proven true and strong. It’s like a light piercing through the darkness, giving me hope and peace.

So far he has not abandoned me, but walked through the valleys with me. And I know, he never will. His is faithful and true, and he speaks to me of his deep love for me – how can I not trust him with everything concerning me?

I know I cannot turn back – I have long passed the point of no return. Every step leads me closer to Pradise, every breath leading me closer into his arms of everlasting love, joy, peace and purpose!

Life is a little subdued these days, due to my heart issue, just feels like I am going in slow motion. No need to worry, the pain has not returned. I am just taking things slow. I have cut back on coffee and I am living on smoothies except dinner with my children, to strengthen my body, by not putting too much strain on it for digestion. Thus it can put more energy into healing me from the inside out. Thus I honor the temple, in which God can dwell more fully every day.

I am not worried, for I know, that he is in control of all things. He leads me into a deeper understanding of his plan through and because of it.

In all the challenges of life, I can choose to trust him more or to trust him less, trying to take things in my own hands. My choice is always: I trust the Lord more. And the more I do, the more he can work in and through me. The more I trust him, and give him the glory for all that happens in my life, the more he can bless me.

I recently realized, that with regards to tithing, listening to the Holy Spirit, reading and obeying his word, praying, fasting or worshipping him, and giving my all to him, he can bless me more and more. The more I open my heart to him, the more he dwells in me, the more I can receive heaven here on earth.

This is his masterplan: his heart towards his children, his beloved, is Yes, Amen and Blessings galore. The dreams that you cannot quench out of your being are your destiny……your destiny is a journey not a destination – we all get there, flaws and all, the more we let his light shine through us.

I am forever thankful, for the closeness of our relationship. My precious Jesus and I – it’s pure love.

Thank you, Jesus, for loving me so much, for leading me closer and closer into your presence. Into paradise. With you.

I know, that with him, my best is yet to come.

Praise God – forever your friend


Appreciation is Key


Dear friends

The last couple of days, the Lord has shown me, that it is really important to appreciate the people around you, for who they are, for the gifts, they bring to the table, and not what or who you would like them to be, or the gifts, you would like them to have.

On Thursday, the Lord prompted me, to pray for my ex-husband….. – I never ended up doing it, cause as I drove to pick up the children from school, I had a severe pain in my chest…..with my left arm going numb and so I had to go to the hospital afterwards, and things got a little frazzled, and then shifted into very slow motion for me. He has left now, is actually flying back home right now.

But the Lord showed me, that maybe more than prayer right now, he needs to feel appreciated for who he is – I guess I never ever really did appreciate him for who he is.

He is a brain person, and he knows a lot about computers and how to do this and that and the other, of how to organize things on the computer – picture editing and so on and so forth. I always knew that…..but I didn’t I appreciated him for that…..actually he drove me crazy, when he wanted to teach me, how to do these things, when we were still together. I thought, why don’t you just do this and leave me alone with it, I don’t really need to know anyway and I am not really interested either. Today I realize, that this is his gift and I never received it. And so I apologized for never appreciating him for who he was and the gifts he brought into the equation.

I delieberately asked him, to help me with a few things, that I did not know, how to do – and listened with a different attitude to what he had to say. And I have to say: I do appreciate his gifts. He does know a lot, and he is very kindhearted. I am very sorry, that because I expected other things, I could not see the amazing person he really is. Thank you Jesus, for opening my eyes. Better late than never.

He is does not believe in God, but when he sees God’s love in motion, and how God is changing me in my attitude and behaviour towards him, it becomes more tangible. Then God can work in his heart.

Many of my needs were not met in our relationship, but neither did I meet all his needs. We did not speak the love language of each other, thus, we didn’t find the path to true happiness and a flourishing relationship. I pray that he and his new wife will be able to be better at that, than we were. They have my blessing.

I am learning, that in whatever it is, that we do, where we are in a relationship with other people (any relationship: husband-wife, parents-children, employer-employee, friend), and when we do not appreciate the gifts, the others bring to the table, we are bound to fail. The relationship turns bad until it’s non-existent, and we move on.

Make it your priority, to value the people in your life, if you want to keep them there…..otherwise, don’t complain, when they leave.

God has created us in his image, thus he created us relational, for he is a relational God. He wants to be in a relationship with us, he wants to relate to us – but we also have to be willing, to relate to him. With him, all things will fall into place. It sometimes takes a little longer, but that very often is due to us not wanting to listen.

I love it, when the Lord gets real with me, and shows me, where I am wrong and what I need to change – once I understand, it actually is easy, to understand the ones around me much better and to get along with them much more easily.

Sometimes the hurt is so deep in the other person, that it may take time to heal, but with each time they feel appreciated for who they are, you start to poke holes into the wall they have built around their hearts, for the Lord to reach in.

May this help you in finding true peace and joy in all of your relationships – God bless you my friends,


God has a plan for you – he surely does. His plans for you are good!Β 

The Names of God
Hello my friends, 

I recorded the following YouTube video yesterday…..he indeed has a plan for YOU – one that fits you to a T. Let me encourage you to dare to follow your dreams. He placed them in your hearts! 

I hope it encourages you to dare to step into the unknown and leave your comfort zone! 

Your friend always,


If I never met you, where would I be?


Hello my dear friends,

you won’t understand, why I am saying this, but: it’s good to be back. Why do I say that? I am back to writing my blog on blogger, rather than on WordPress. It’s funny that I even say that…..but it truly feels good to be back.

It’s been an interesting journey over the last years. God has been my healer, he has been the one I run to for every decision. 

Sometimes it takes me longer to understand, what he is trying to tell me…..but I cannot fathom, where I would be, if I never had met him. I am set free from so much. He has bestowed dignity and a confidence of who I am in him – simply incredible! Thank you, Jesus for loving me so much, and for reaching into the deepest parts of my heart, and to heal me from the inside out.

I am still learning to trust him, to be my sole provider. It goes so contrary to the common world view, that I stand here all alone…..walking by faith and not by sight. He has given me insight into his design for the world, that his ways truly are higher. I am having a hard time to trust, I admit that, for I have been taught all my life to believe differently.

Unfortunately, when we loose sight of who God really is, how much the Holy One truly loves us, we fall prey to the lies of the devil, that make us believe that we need money to cover our needs. 

He’s got that all wrong: we need Jesus – we need to fall in love with Jesus, we need to listen to the guidance of the Holy Spirit, and obey his promptings without restrictions.

Over the last little while, the devil almost had me cave in, because I, too, in my limited understanding of God, Heaven and the true template of life on earth, could not see, what he is trying to teach me. But when I listen closely, and only to my Jesus, I know, I am safe. He is going to make a way, when I see none. For he has created the Heavens and the Earth, he is the light, the way and the truth. Nothing exists, that has not been created through, in and for him.

Yesterday, as my church dedicated the little baby of one family of our congregation and all their family gathered, I felt such a collective deep longing for the return of Jesus, the risen Christ, that I know, he is coming back for his bride very soon.

I cannot wait to see him face to face. The only true love of my life – the one that I have been waiting for for such a long time. I know it won’t be long now, until we’ll be reunited for good.

In love with him, united in an everlasting love. Thank you, Jesus, for loving me and all mankind so much.

Your friend forever